It's Funny How They Work

It's funny how some days it's like you're waking up from a dream.
You suddenly realise things aren't right or the way you were imagining them.
Sometimes it's good, Sometimes it sucks

I feel trapped. Suffocating. Why are they looking at me like that? What did I say wrong? Have I offended them? Maybe they can read my thoughts, that's it, gotta be it, why else would they turn their backs to me like that?
This isn't a story, just thoughts, that we all think when we're sitting in our group of friends.
You want to fit in, but want to be yourself. Sometimes it isn't so bad, you just agree with what they're saying, but sometimes, like today, you feel the need to stand up and walk away. To escape. To get out.
You're just annoyed with the petty conversation they're having, the fake laughter, the eager sharing of gossip.

I've never liked following someone. I always have to go my own way or have my own opinions. That's what it should be like. Everyday. But your friends aren't that bad, of course they aren't, but sometimes you need your space. You need to be an outsider and realise that the world your building isn't stable.
That's what I continually tell myself to do. Back-up. You're getting too close. I know it shouldn't be like that, but I have other friends I need to look out for. Other conversation to be had.

You need to step back once and a while. Whether it's to see how stupid you look or how petty, or maybe if you're lucky, how happy.

Kimberley Doreen x